Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
