got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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