i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
he fucked my hip out of place.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
