drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
