My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize