remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
