you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
