Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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