i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
