Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
