OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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