I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize