Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize