She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
