Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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