I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
