the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
