we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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