They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Randomize
