Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
