she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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