I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
