but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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