im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize