Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
