If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
