the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
