Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
