oh god the rape fog is back!
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
did i walk over a car last night?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
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