Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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