Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
This is the high leading the old right now
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
