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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.

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• (845): View more from New York

  Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.

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• (516): View more from New York

  drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries

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• (713): View more from Texas

  OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay

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• (682): View more from Texas

  Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.

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• (718): View more from New York

  Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"

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• (707): View more from California

  Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.

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• (585): View more from New York

  We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?

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