I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
