i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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