gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
