Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
