i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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