if you like me you must not know who I am
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize