Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Who died my cat blue again?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
