i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
They left me at home... I'm a liability
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
