well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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