Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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