Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
