You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize