YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
