smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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