Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Randomize
