Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
