I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize