I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
