ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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