Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
