Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize